I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Randomize
