i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
And then he peed in my hair
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