There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
