piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
