come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
