Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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