I cockslap morals
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
