I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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