How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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