Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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