why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
