He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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