Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
