Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Randomize
