if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
