Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
