so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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