the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
