this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm bleeding and have questions
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
