i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Randomize
