I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I got chris browned last night
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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