ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
