I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
