I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
