I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
try to milk me bitch
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