Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
