It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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