the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
