So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Randomize
