Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Your cock deserves a montage
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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