Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
