yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize