Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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