I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
