watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
