He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Randomize
