I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
