She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
