Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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