What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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