My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
