I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
