problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
