we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
