There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
sex in a hospital.. check
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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