i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
