Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
