I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
