Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
