Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Randomize
